Because I have a few more pressing things to get off my chest, and let’s face it, we all need a little levity now and again. Please do not take anything said here too seriously . . . I mean they’re all true, and there is definitely some serious interwoven with the sarcastic, but also, I can laugh at myself and my weirdness because y’all, we’re all weird.
1. I do not like reading aloud to my children (honestly, I just don’t like reading out loud period . . . I read too fast and stumble over the words). Go ahead . . . gasp . . . judge. You’re not changing anything. Thankfully, my almost 15 year isn’t about that life anymore, but I still have to power through for my youngest.
2. Speaking of reading . . . have I ever told y’all that other than my Bible, I almost exclusively read fiction when it comes to books? I have probably read less than five non-fiction books in the last 15 years. Life is too serious. To me reading should be an escape . . . a way to relax . . . and honestly, I find that the Bible more than fulfills my need for “self help” if you will. AND I know the Bible is far more than a “self help” book so don’t come at me. The Bible is my life line, and I 100% know it is not just a book of good advice.
3. Having said that, I do read medical websites and studies. For fun. I’m weird.
4. And, for someone that won’t read self help, I do love me a good Christian marriage and/or parenting podcast. I listen while I clean (I love to clean). It’s glorious.
5. Also, if you’re not listening to true-crime podcasts, and then staring at all your friends and family with suspicion are you even doing life right???
6. Just in case I haven’t solidified my nerdiness . . . I’m obsessed with sci-fi and to some extent fantasy movies (and books). Give me some Star Wars, Star Trek (My Star Trek love might be my biggest confession ever . . . cheesy and corny? absolutely . . . so much fun to watch? also, absolutely . . . ), Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit, Narnia . . . I am there for all of them.
7. In keeping with the same vein . . . weirdness . . . I have a weather obsession. I should’ve been a meteorologist. I check the weather approximately 800 times/day as if that’s going to change anything. I stalk weather websites. Also, it’s (way too) hot and (way too) dry in Texas. I don’t love the dead of summer, and it came early this year.
8. I HATE camping. Abhor it. It’s solidly against my ethical and moral beliefs for no other reason than the fact that I hate it. I feel like I’ve told y’all this one before as well. But for emphasis I must restate. I HATE it. Everyone’s like, “You can set your tent up near the restrooms where you can shower . . . “, “You can plug a fan in with an extension cord . . . “, “You can bring a portable potty . . . ” (gag me), “You can sleep on a cot, and it’s so comfy . . . ” OR . . . OR . . . OR . . . I can check into the Marriott down the road. Hike all day . . . sweat . . . get dirty . . . and go back to my hotel room and shower and sleep in a real bed with real AC. Yes and amen. And seriously y’all, there is no need to try to sell me on the greatness that is (not) camping. It’s not a moral failure that I don’t like to camp, and I promise if you set out to convince me, you will die on that hill because I am not changing my mind.
9. The beach . . . the ocean . . . absolutely beautiful . . . the crashing waves . . . the roaring seas . . . the sun reflecting off the water . . . the salt and sand sticking to me . . . the burning of my eyes and skin . . . my hair becoming frizzier by the minute . . . the hauling of every toy and towel and chair ever made down to the beach to sit there for approximately an hour only to hear, “Can we go to the pool now?” Sorry, I got sidetracked. I have an odd relationship with the beach. I love it, but going to the beach with kids is not relaxing. It’s a lot of work. And because I’m virtually transparent, I have to wear copious amounts of SPF 1,000,000 and reapply every 10 min. But alas my children (mainly my youngest) love the beach so I’ve spent many an hour applying sunscreen and sitting in the sand to please their water loving souls.
10. I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again. I’m a huge introvert. And I’m a bit socially awkward. But once you get to know me, you realize that I’m definitely not shy or quiet, and I promise I’m not rude. I’m just reserved. Because, as I said before . . . socially awkward. And I would say something cliché (and possibly, profound???) like “still waters run deep”, but I confessed I like Star Trek so I’m not sure y’all will buy it.
THE END … I promise that’s it for Courtney’s Confessions … at least for a while.