The bible is not a self-help book . . .

Jesus was not just a “good” guy . . .

We, as Christians, are not just called to be motivational speakers . . .

We can’t cherry pick what we want to address . . . pick and choose which sins we’re for and which we’re against . . . what we want to ignore or pay attention to . . . that’s not how it works.

We’re called to be salt and light . . . salt brings flavor, but also, it both burns and heals wounds. . . light chases away darkness, but it also has the ability to purify and disinfect.

If we aren’t speaking truth. If we’re just saying what makes others and ourselves happy, we are living exactly what is written in the opening verses of 2 Timothy 3.

But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away! For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth. Now as Jannes and Jambres resisted Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, disapproved concerning the faith; but they will progress no further, for their folly will be manifest to all, as theirs also was. 2 Timothy 3:1-9

Having a form of godliness . . . treating the bible like it’s our own personal book of inspirational quotes . . . our way to get what we want as if God is the great genie in the sky . . . picking and choosing what gives us all the good feelings . . . leaving out what we find “offensive”. We’re walking through life with a form of godliness, but we’re denying the power of the Word of God to transform and truly change our lives. We’re too afraid of offending others to stand on the truth of what the Bible really is.

For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account. Hebrews 4:12-13

It is so much more than a feel good, inspirational, self-help book. It is literally our manual and the measure by which we must judge ourselves and everything around us. It is, cover to cover, meant to instruct, guide, lead, and yes, inspire us, but it’s not meant to only inspire. It’s meant to completely transform who we are as we yield ourselves to the leading of Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit.

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14

Full of grace and truth. I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating, grace and truth are not mutually exclusive. Grace is so very important, but it’s only through the absolute truth of God’s Word can we experience the fullness of His grace.

There are 27 books in the New Testament. Of those, at least 13, possibly 14, were written by Paul in the form of epistles to the early church. One of the most beautiful things I find in regard to these letters is they are no less relevant today than they were almost 2000 years ago. The instruction and wisdom from Paul still stand, and as I’ve said so many times before, Paul was huge on grace and forgiveness, we serve a loving and gracious Heavenly Father, but Paul was never soft on sin. He knew that sin leads to death, and he called it like he saw it. If you were doing wrong, he was going to call you out. If a leader was preaching or teaching something that was not sound, he was, for sure, going to call it out. Not out of malice, or anger, or hatred . . . exactly the opposite . . . his love for people was so great . . . his desire to see them come to true salvation, not some cheap counterfeit, ran too deep. He was willing to risk being hated, persecuted, imprisoned, and eventually, martyred so that others could be free. He knew that true salvation brings repentance and transformation in the lives of believers. He knew that following the leading and directing of Christ would mean suffering. He knew that the life of a Christian is not about getting all you can and pocketing your free ticket to Heaven. He knew the price of salvation is free to us, but the cost was immeasurable.

The book of Acts was written by Luke. In it we read the both the account of the “acts” of the early church and of Paul’s conversion and missionary journeys throughout the Roman Empire. In Acts 26, after being imprisoned for two years, Paul has the opportunity to address King Agrippa, and these words, from Acts 26 verses 19-20, carry so much weight in what was, as a whole, a moving and profound address from Paul to King Agrippa.

“So, King Agrippa, I did not prove disobedient to the heavenly vision, but kept declaring both to those of Damascus first, and also at Jerusalem and then throughout all the region of Judea, and even to the Gentiles, that they should repent and turn to God, performing deeds appropriate to repentance.“

May we not prove to be disobedient. May we never take God or His word lightly or with irreverence. May we keep declaring the imperativeness of repentance, turning to God, and performing deeds appropriate to repentance. May we not have only a form of godliness but instead embrace the fullness of the power of salvation.

Did I intend to go almost a month without a writing a single word? No. Did I expect for us to be as busy as we are before school is even back in full swing? Also, no. But as I’ve said before (I know . . . broken record and all that), life with a teenager and a ten-year-old in two different schools, in two different cities, is some kind of crazy.

At the beginning of this year, I wrote the words “flexibility” and “grace” in my bible and prayer journal. Fun fact about me, I’m about as far opposite of “flexible” as a person can get . . . figuratively speaking, of course . . . although I’m no gymnast either so we could probably say both figuratively and physically. Some may even say I’m a little bit rigid. I’m a planner that plans her plans. I like a very set, very structured routine . . . so I had kids . . . go ahead, laugh. I’m also not the most gracious (or graceful) person on the planet. I often expect too much of myself and others (i.e. perfection), and have, in the past at least, allowed those expectations to violate the boundaries of others. In short, I tend to not be great at extending grace, and I’ve probably, more than once stuck my nose and given my opinions where they did not belong. I promise I’m a blast to be around.

Enter one kid in high school, playing sports and doing every activity under the sun, another kid in elementary school, church, athletic boosters, the real estate office, remodeling a house, and on and on . . . this year has been an exercise in insanity, or rephrased both flexibility and grace.

We’re almost eight full months into this year, and I’ve learned a few things:

1. Flexibility and grace go hand in hand with establishing and respecting boundaries. Flexibility and grace allow me to say “no” when needed and also, to respect the “no” of others. Your choices for your immediate family, are your choices. Period. That applies to both extended family and friends. Unless it directly affects me or my immediate family, which it rarely does, or there’s abuse, neglect, etc. happening, then it’s not my problem, choice, or decision. Further, I’m not responsible for making others happy or keeping up with their expectations of me. Just because you think I “should do _____” does not mean, I can, will, or actually should. My priorities are, as I’ve said many times before, first my relationship with God, second my marriage, third my children, and finally, extended family, church, work, and so on (not necessarily in that order). Flexibility has given me the freedom to set the necessary boundaries and say, “not my circus, not my monkeys, not my responsibility”, and grace has allowed me to hear what others are saying, respect their boundaries, and say “cool . . . I get it . . . or not . . . regardless, I respect what you’re asking of me”. Whether I agree with the other person, has absolutely nothing to do with respecting their boundaries. If I choose to then rehash and vent about all the things I think they’re doing wrong, I’m doing everything but respecting them . . . shutting my mouth has been the hardest lesson for me to learn. Cliff’s Notes: Quit taking on problems that aren’t yours to take on. Quit giving your opinion and advice when it’s neither needed nor wanted, and it’s not your business. If you’re truly concerned pray for them, and then live your own life.
2. Sometimes, I need to take a moment and breathe. That might mean stepping away for a second, because frazzled Courtney is not always nice, and she is definitely not flexible and gracious. In the same vein, what seems like a crisis at 2:00 a.m. is typically not a crisis . . . and 2:00 a.m. Courtney is not a particularly reasonable and rational person. So, what do I do when the stupid anxiety/mom guilt/racing thoughts hit at 2:00 a.m. as they like to do? I pray. A lot of times, if I start praying, not just for myself but for others, I’ll find myself drifting back to sleep rather quickly. But if I’m still awake after praying for a while, I’ll pull out my kindle and read. That almost always switches my brain off or at least shifts it into a different mode.
3. I’m not supposed to be perfect, but I am redeemed. I serve a God who has extended me so much grace and honestly, is way beyond flexible with me so I have a responsibility to do the same for myself and others. Adding to that, not everything is going to go according to plan and schedule. The world is not going to end over it. Breathe, pray, and adjust.

Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones. Proverbs 16:24

Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. Ephesians 4:29

Corrupt – Unwholesome – rotten, useless, corrupt, depraved. (Strong’s 4550)

“Unwholesome” may include cursing and cussing, but it’s not limited to those things. We have created this culture of “venting” both outside and within church, of talking badly about others but trying to pass it off as caring and concern, and all it really amounts to is unwholesome, rotten, useless, talk. You can speak an entire novel of unwholesome words and it sound very pious and holy. Sometimes our best bet is to just shut up.

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28

God sees us. He loves us. He has our backs. This life is short in light of eternity, we have to remember that so much of what matters today, won’t matter a year from now.

Well, we have about half a week left before Courtney’s Taxi Service starts easing back into working hours again. Thankfully, all the crazy doesn’t all happen once, but the reality is summer is winding down, and school starts in less than a month for both of my kiddos.

As much as I love the slower(ish) pace of summer . . . okay, scratch that because let’s face it, this summer hasn’t exactly been “slow” . . . it’s been more like madness with a nonexistent routine thrown in for good measure, and I love me a routine . . . anyhow, all that to say, I am very much looking forward to the routine that comes with the kids actually having some structure in their lives. They need structure. I need structure. Because as busy as we have been, I am not in the entertainment industry, and I don’t believe in filling every waking hour with doing “stuff” much to their dismay.

But with the routine comes the crazy, and all the crazy is about to ensue. While I’m ready for it, I also feel like I haven’t accomplished what I generally accomplish in the summer months because I haven’t had the time. So, I’m spending the next few days trying to catch up and put our lives in order before everyone starts back to their busy days and packed evenings.

Here’s the other thing. Somewhere, along the way, we decided that school should start the middle of August, and yet, the back-to-school ads are filled with kids in fall clothes, with their sweatshirts and their backpacks and the leaves falling around them as they head back to school on a beautiful crisp cool morning. You know what we’re not wearing in August (well, unless you’re a middle schooler and weather appropriate clothing isn’t your thing)? Sweatshirts. You know what else isn’t happening in August? Crisp and cool or leaves falling off the trees . . . unless it’s because they’re dead from lack of rain. Let’s be honest, we’d have to start school in mid-October in this part of the world for that to even be a remote possibility because in Texas summer is six months long if it’s a day.

Accurate back to school ads would involve children wearing shorts and t-shirts, drenched in sweat, trudging to and from school in both oppressive humidity and blazing sun. They should involve sunscreen, hats, and heat exhaustion, because that’s all that 100+ degree temps are good for.

I’m 42, and with each passing year, I loathe summer a little more. Not because my kids are out of school. They’re actually only out of school for part of summer as it is. I loathe summer because I’m 100% certain that Texas summers are trying to take my middle-aged self out. I am so white, I’m almost transparent so stepping outside requires copious amounts of sunscreen . . . skin cancer is not cool y’all nor are wrinkles. I don’t particularly enjoy swimming or sweating . . . which are almost the same thing at this point. And I’m not even sure why I try to garden because every summer I have hopes of no drought and rainy days . . . and every summer I’m disappointed and left with burnt up plants that no amount of watering will save.

In short, I’m ready for fall . . . which is approximately 90 days away give or take a few. But you’d best believe the second I cart these children off to school, I’m entering the land of strong denial. I’m putting away the spring and summer decor and pulling out all the fall stuff. I’m getting out my fall scented candles and I’m cranking the AC down and putting on a sweatshirt and leggings because this is just who I am. The one thing I won’t be partaking in whenever they make their reappearance? Pumpkin spice anything because no matter how hard I try to like it, and I have tried y’all, to me it tastes like perfume smells.

And with that last little nugget of unnecessary information, I’m off to try and salvage what’s left of my summer to do list. Try not to melt y’all.

Summer thus far . . . a list:

• 1 week in Yosemite . . . beautiful, breathtaking, words cannot begin to describe how awesome it was.
• Celebrated both mine and Patrick’s 42nd birthdays.
• 3 days at a church youth conference . . . with 10 teenagers . . . it was great, but I am also keenly aware of the fact that in the world of youth leaders we are in the geriatric category . . . enough said.
• Planning my aunt’s memorial/celebration of life in the midst of everything else.
• 1 amazing life celebration that was all the things . . . exhausting and healing and a huge blessing.
• Getting to spend amazing, quality time, albeit too short, with extended family. We laughed, we cried, and we ate. What more could you want?
• 5 days in Mexico with Patrick to celebrate our 20th anniversary . . . perfect and much needed.
• And home again to all the life things . . . day camps, back to school shopping, laundry, cleaning . . .

Of course, there have been a million other little things in between all the traveling and big events, but you get the gist. It’s been kinda crazy, folks. And it’s hard to believe we’re on the downhill side of summer. My youngest starts school in four weeks, and my oldest starts a few days later. In a lot of ways, I miss the routine, but at the same time, I don’t. I’ve actually found myself more flexible this summer, and I like it. I’m not perfect. I still get my underwear in a bunch from time to time, but if the house doesn’t get cleaned or the laundry doesn’t get done right on schedule, I’ve also realized that life goes on, and we’ll all survive.

I hope everyone is having a great summer. If I have a minute and feel so inclined, I’ll try to hop on here at some point in the next few weeks, but if not, I’ll be back sometime in August. Here’s to the rest of the summer . . . may it be slightly cooler . . . please, Lord, make it cooler . . . and may it be a whole lot of peaceful and relaxing.

I’ll leave you with one of my pics from Yosemite . . . where it was beautiful and cool and not 103 degrees.

It’s been just over three weeks since I last wrote, and yet, it feels like a lifetime has passed. This summer has had some wonderful moments thus far, but it has also brought with it a heartbreaking loss for our family. I don’t write much about my personal life and family in this space, but I can’t continue on with business as usual without taking a moment to acknowledge this loss. Almost two weeks ago, my aunt, my Dad’s eldest sibling, passed away unexpectedly. I don’t know that you can ever be prepared to lose someone you love, but this was a death that caught us completely off guard. I find myself oscillating between grief and shock as I try to come to terms with the reality of her being gone. I had the honor of being able to write a portion of her obituary, and the process of writing it, while one of the hardest things I’ve done because I wanted to honor my aunt well, was also healing for me. So, I thought rather than avoid the topic, I’d take the time to acknowledge and honor her here, in this space and share a part of what I wrote and in turn, just a bit who she was . . .

Karen Gail McCrary, 69, was called home to the Lord on June 14^th, 2023, leaving behind a legacy of a life lived in His service with impact on many. Karen was born on July 1^st, 1953, in Luling, TX to Bettie and Wayne McCrary, Sr.  

The eldest of five children, Karen was always available to help keep her younger siblings in line as they moved to various areas of the state while Wayne, Sr. worked in the oil industry. Eventually, the family landed back in Luling where Karen finished out the remainder of her school years. In high school Karen was an athlete, a diligent student, and an active participant in any number of extracurricular activities. She played volleyball and basketball, served on the pep squad and student council, was part of the yearbook staff and one act play, and was Miss FTA and Homecoming Queen nominee her senior year just to give a small sampling of the many goings on in her teenage years. Most in keeping with her personality, Karen was voted wittiest in high school in her sophomore, junior, and senior years. Karen graduated from Luling High School in 1971, and her quick wit and love of both reading and writing would prove to be instrumental as she began her career at the Luling Newsboy.

Family was extremely important to Karen. While no one could ever best her in a game of Scrabble, many a loud and boisterous debate happened around the McCrary table while eating a meal or playing dominoes. Karen was a daughter, a sister, and a beloved friend to so many, but perhaps her most important and cherished role was that of aunt. Although Karen never had any children of her own, she loved and spoiled her nieces and nephews as if they were hers, and they loved and adored her equally as much. She was happy to train those little people in the skill of sarcasm and wit, and they provided her with endless entertainment and reasons to chuckle. Times were never more fun than when Aunt Karen was around. Whether it was baking and decorating Christmas cookies, hosting slumber parties, taking dozens upon dozens of candid photos, writing about their latest accomplishments or mischievous shenanigans, as the case may have been, in Karen’s Column, or letting them help stuff papers at the Newsboy, she was an ever-present presence in their lives from the moment they were born, and she carried on that tradition of love and fun with her great nieces and nephews.

This doesn’t even begin to encompass all of who my Aunt Karen was or the full life she led. I could share stories for days. She was a gifted writer . . . she was the editor and publisher of our small-town newspaper for decades. She was funny and fun, and spent what probably added up to years of her life volunteering with various organizations in my hometown. She loved her friends and her family and her community well. So, while it would take a series of novels to truly do justice to the person she was, I hope it gives those reading a small glimpse into her life.

Grief is a funny thing. It’s deeply personal and yet, somehow very public, and with every loss it’s slightly different. Sometimes, it pulls you inward while other times it pushes you toward others. I’ve found myself tearing up these past two weeks at the most random times, but I’ve also found myself smiling just as often. I’ve laughed at the stories shared by others and found comfort and joy in a community of hundreds of people gathering around our family to help us mourn and celebrate my Aunt Karen’s life. And come Saturday, the date of her 70th birthday, we’ll gather with family and friends to celebrate the person she was and the life she lived. I have no doubt there will be tears, but there will also be lots of laughs . . . and for good measure, prolific use of one of her favorite words . . . “morons” . . .

To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:

A time to be born,
And a time to die;
A time to plant,
And a time to pluck what is planted;
A time to kill,
And a time to heal;
A time to break down,
And a time to build up;
A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance

Ecclesiastes 3:1-4

We are wrapping up our first full week of summer. I officially have a fourth grader and a sophomore in high school, and in just about four months, my oldest will be turning 16. There is something so beautifully bittersweet about this time in our lives.

I look at my children, and I wonder where the time went. What happened to those baby and toddler days, with chubby cheeks and sticky hands, sloppy kisses, and being toted around on mom’s hip? Where did those kindergarten and first grade days go, with their toothless little grins and silly little laughs? Andrew outgrew me in both weight and height years ago, and Anna is close to being as tall as I am (which honestly isn’t saying much . . . I’m not even five feet tall). Anna outgrows shoes and jeans like it’s her job, and with every passing day, Andrew becomes less of child and more of a man.

It is so hard to believe. So hard to grasp how rapidly time passes, and there is a temptation to hold onto the past. To hold tightly to their childhood. To never let them go or grow. To resist the urge to hold them a bit more responsible with each passing year. To hinder rather than propel them toward independence. But if I did that, I wouldn’t just be selling them short, I’d be selling myself short as well. Because as much as it is so bittersweet, it is also so beautiful. As crazy as my 15-year-old can make me, and y’all somedays he makes me C.R.A.Z.Y. (I think it’s God’s way of preparing me to send him out into the world), watching him become more and more independent, sharing in actual “adult-ish” conversations and interests, and being able to witness him morphing into the young man and leader God has created him to be, is the greatest gift. And then there’s my youngest, with all her struggles and needs, she sometimes says and does things that absolutely blow me away, and while I don’t know exactly how her journey to be as independent as possible will play out, I can tell you that she is absolutely amazing. We have hard moments and sometimes, hard days and weeks, but the privilege of watching her transform into her own person is not lost on me.

In three short years, we’ll be preparing to send our oldest off to college, and the reality is, he may come home for short stints here and there, but more likely than not, in three short years, he’ll be packing up and leaving our home forever. While I know most parents prefer their babies stay home for as long as possible, while I know I’ll shed more than a few tears, and I’ll miss him desperately (who else will play Trivial Pursuit, discuss books, and watch Jeopardy with me?), I also can’t wait to see what is in store for him. And I would be lying if I said I’m not encouraging him to spread his wings beyond the small world he knows right now.

I recently heard someone say, they don’t live in the past, but they don’t rush toward the future either. Instead, they embrace the present, and that’s what I’m here for. I want to cherish each beautiful, hard, and bittersweet moment. To realize what a gift the here and now is, while also preparing for what lies ahead. And with that . . . we have a fun, but busy summer ahead. Which let’s face it . . . that’s life in this season with a 10 and 15 year old . . . busy . . . While, I do hope to pop on here from time to time, I may not be as present here as I sometimes am because the most important thing, at least in this moment, is being fully present with my people. May your summer be amazing and full of all the good things.

“It is, in a way, an odd thing to honor those who died in defense of our country, in defense of us, in wars far away. The imagination plays a trick. We see these soldiers in our mind as old and wise. We see them as something like the Founding Fathers, grave and gray haired. But most of them were boys when they died, and they gave up two lives — the one they were living and the one they would have lived. When they died, they gave up their chance to be husbands and fathers and grandfathers. They gave up their chance to be revered old men. They gave up everything for our country, for us. And all we can do is remember.” Ronald Reagan, November 11, 1985

The words “Happy Memorial Day” just don’t seem fitting . . . to attach happy to a day we’ve set aside to honor the lives lost in defense of our great nation. While I don’t believe any of these soldiers would begrudge Americans their day of rest . . . their day of barbecues and family gatherings . . . of picnics and swimming . . . I believe so many who are no longer with us would tell us to embrace all that we have . . . to cherish each moment and hold those we love a bit closer. And I also believe we would be remiss in going about this day as if it’s a day only of celebration and not honor. A day of giddiness and not gravity. A day of games and fun without any solemnity.

There is something so bittersweet in the celebration of a life well lived. The point of intersection where grief and joy meet . . . where precious and beautiful memories clash with the reality that the person, so well loved, will never be with you, on this earth, again. And I believe this is even more true with a life that is given in sacrifice to one’s country. Words alone cannot express the immensity of gratitude for these men and women who gave all they had. . . who sacrificed their lives, not just for their own freedom, not just for the freedom of those they loved, but for the freedom of total strangers . . . for you and for me. Who willingly walked into battle knowing they may never return . . . to their homes, their friends, their families . . . to the country they loved enough for which to die. The enormity of their sacrifice cannot be overstated.

Today, as we go about our business . . . as we gather with family . . . as we drive to work . . . as we do our normal day to day activities . . . may we take the time to stop and honor those who have sacrificed everything so we may live in the freedom we currently have. May we remember that these were sons and daughters, husbands and wives, mothers and fathers, brothers and sisters, friends so dearly loved. May we never be flippant about the freedom that results from that sacrifice. May we never take it for granted. The price paid was too high, the sacrifice too great, for us to hold it in anything but the highest regard.

Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends – John 15:13

As hard as it is to believe, we’re on the downhill side of May. School is wrapping up, high school and college graduations are upon us, and time seems to be passing at warp speed. My oldest is finishing his first year in high school, and what a fantastic year it has been. My youngest will be entering upper elementary next year, and it’s amazing how much growth we see with each passing year.

As we enter what is a huge transition time for so many, I find myself thinking once again about all I didn’t know as navigated those brief high school years and jumped right into college . . . all the things I wish I understood then. But as they say hindsight and all that . . . so here’s what I want to say to all the teenagers right now.

• You’re amazing. You’re a gift from God. You’re talented and smart and blessed. AND the world does not revolve around you. Sorry. The sooner you realize that the better.
• High school can be fun and miserable all at once. It is a time of rapid growth and change, and I think it’s so important to remember, it’s not the pinnacle of your life. You have not peaked in high school or at your high school graduation . . . you’re just getting started. You have so much life left to live.
• Having said that, be present. Live today fully. As cliché as it sounds, you’ll never get this day back, and maybe you don’t want to. But you should neither spend your life longing for the next big thing nor should you waste your time wishing for what has already passed. Embrace today.
• But also . . . be wise and make plans. Just don’t hold those plans with a clenched fist. Flexibility. Flexibility. Flexibility.
• Your path is your path. We’re not all the same, but we’re all fearfully and wonderfully made. Maybe your path will lead you to college or the workforce or trade school or the military . . . maybe it will be some combination of the above. Whatever it is do it with all your heart. Work hard, be kind, treat others with respect . . . you’re not owed anything.
• Sometimes debt is inevitable but try not to bury yourself in it at a young age. Choose wisely. Spend wisely. Save for a rainy day. God gave you a brain for a reason.
• Dating is all well and good, but you don’t need another person to complete you. You don’t have to have a boyfriend/girlfriend to be happy, and it’s worth it to wait for the person that truly loves you for who you are.
• Eat right and exercise. I promise you won’t regret it.
• Sleep . . . it’s so important.
• Put God first . . . always. Pray. Read your bible. Most importantly, no matter what . . . no matter how many mistakes you make . . . no matter what comes at you . . . remember Jesus loves you more than you can even imagine.

To all the mothers . . . whether you be new to the this whole motherhood thing or have years of experience behind you . . . whether you’re being celebrated today or not . . . if you have a houseful of littles or an empty nest that is quiet and calm . . . know, no matter how hard it is some days, how challenging, how lonely, how exhausting . . . how beautiful, exciting, and joy filled . . . on the most mundane of days when you just want a moment of peace, a clean house, and some rest . . . you are so valued. The role you play . . . the calling you have is far from inconsequential . . . it is one of the highest callings and most important roles God has given. May your Mother’s Day be filled with peace and joy, love and honor.

Happy Mother’s Day

Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. – Romans 12:15

I think, as Christians, we’ve gotten pretty good at weeping with those who weep. We sit well with others hurting. We’ve learned, some of us better than others, to be okay with the uncomfortable emotions that accompany grief and pain. We can dive deep into misery alongside those around us.

But . . .

We’ve concurrently lost the ability to rejoice with those who rejoice. We exist in a highly competitive, get ahead at all costs, be the best society, and the church is no exception. Make no mistake, I believe in healthy competition. I believe that in the right context it propels you to push harder and do better. It is what helps us to push our limits beyond what we think is possible. But there is a point of diminishing returns with competition . . . when we can no longer be happy for others . . . when we can only celebrate successes if they’re less than our own . . . when we cannot say “good job”, “congratulations”, or “way to go” because we feel like the accomplishments of others somehow diminish ours . . . when we, I daresay, would rather see others fail than do well . . . we’ve reached the point where we’ve crossed the line from healthy competition into an unhealthy trap of comparison and jealousy that will only lead to misery.

Sometimes it’s hard. It’s hard to rejoice with those who rejoice. Especially, in direct competition, but this is not exclusive to direct competition. It seems to cross all lines, and it can be hard to watch others succeed when you don’t think, for whatever reason, they should. But feeding the monster of jealousy and envy and pride is never the answer. The answer can feel both impossibly hard and ridiculously simple . . . open your mouth and offer sincere encouragement and congratulations. Even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard. It’s amazing how that silences the monster almost instantly.

We’ve learned to weep with those who are weeping, and now I think it’s time to rejoice with those who are rejoicing. To celebrate the successes and achievements of others just because it’s the right thing to do. And as with so many things, the unintended benefit is going to be a level of peace and joy in our lives that comes when we refuse to constantly play the comparison game.