My husband pointed out to me the other day that it had been a very long time since I had written anything. The truth is February was a rough month in our house. I think we were all sick for some portion of the month. I had two different viruses over the course of a couple weeks, one that left me in bed for quite a few days which is unusual for me. Then just as we were coming out of February and into March, I was faced with some other health issues which, without going into a lot of detail, I’m still working and praying through and waiting to hear back on. Add to that, the normal chaos of our lives, and honestly, some days I’m doing good to just keep pushing forward.
All that to say, I have, for my entire life, had to fight hard against fear. If I’m honest there have been times, not just in the distant past, when I let fear settle in, and I started to spiral. I’m so thankful that I serve a Savior that rather than hold that against me, picks me up, and basically says, “Let’s try this again.”
This morning, as my youngest was getting ready to leave she said, “Mom, will you say my prayers with me?” This was something we used to do every morning on the way to school, but since my oldest started driving, my husband takes her to school now. I think most days they do pray, but he’s kind of taken over that morning role. So, when she asked today, I was happy to oblige. Part of that routine is praying scripture, and I know some people get all bent out of shape when it comes to taking scriptures (especially old testament scripture) and applying them to our lives now. Here’s where I’ve landed on that after a lot of time spent praying, I know for certain that God through the power of the Holy Spirit, has led me time and again to the book of Isaiah (to name just one of the places I’ve been led). I know that the book of Isaiah was written directly to and for the children of Israel, and yet Hebrews 4:12 says, “For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.” God is not bound by time and place nor is His word, and while I thoroughly believe that understanding of the context and audience of a scripture or scriptures is very important, the Bible isn’t just a history lesson to be studied and learned from. It is active and alive. It is intimately, applicable to us today.
And so we said our prayers . . . we don’t pray all of these words from Isaiah 54:10-17, but we do pray a big chunk of them. I think Isaiah 54 is one of the most beautiful chapters in God’s word. It is speaking of the redemption of Israel, and yet, in it, we see mirrored our own redemption.
10 “For the mountains shall depart
And the hills be removed,
But My kindness shall not depart from you,
Nor shall My covenant of peace be removed,”
Says the Lord, who has mercy on you.
11 “O you afflicted one,
Tossed with tempest, and not comforted,
Behold, I will lay your stones with colorful gems,
And lay your foundations with sapphires.
12 I will make your pinnacles of rubies,
Your gates of crystal,
And all your walls of precious stones.
13 All your children shall be taught by the Lord,
And great shall be the peace of your children.
14 In righteousness you shall be established;
You shall be far from oppression, for you shall not fear;
And from terror, for it shall not come near you.
15 Indeed they shall surely assemble, but not because of Me.
Whoever assembles against you shall fall for your sake.
16 “Behold, I have created the blacksmith
Who blows the coals in the fire,
Who brings forth an instrument for his work;
And I have created the spoiler to destroy.
17 No weapon formed against you shall prosper,
And every tongue which rises against you in judgment
You shall condemn.
This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord,
And their righteousness is from Me,”
Says the Lord.
Over the past almost decade, God has drawn me back to these words over and over to remind me of who and whose I am. To remind me of Who He is. I don’t say them flippantly. I don’t see them as some hocus pocus incantation to get whatever I want. What I can say is that the same God that loves Israel with an everlasting love, loves me just as deeply and just as infinitely.
Fear is going to come, but we cannot let fear take hold. As someone who likes to be in control, this is hard for me, but I know the God of the universe is in control. It doesn’t mean that I don’t feel fear. It doesn’t mean that I love the uncertainty or don’t feel anxiety about the possible outcomes of what is ahead. What it means over and over, if I have to do it 1000 times a day and then 1000 times more, I will turn this back to God. I will press into His word and into Him. I will not, as much as I want to, hide under my actual or proverbial covers.
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. – 2 Timothy 1:7
Courtney's Contemplations . . . 