I know my alarm is going off in about an hour and a half.
I’m still beyond tired.
But my brain will. not. stop.
I try to pray but interrupt myself figuring out all the things I can do to fix all the things that need fixing.
I need to leave it at the feet of Jesus. I need to rest at the feet of Jesus, but I’m too busy having a Martha moment.
Now it happened as they went that He entered a certain village; and a certain woman named Martha welcomed Him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who also sat at Jesus’ feet and heard His word. But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me.” And Jesus answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.”
One . . . I get Martha. Martha is my people. I am Martha.
Two . . . I would’ve been so annoyed with Mary. I would’ve been grumbling and complaining about how Mary never helps with anything because she’s too busy worshipping Jesus. Does she think things just magically happen???
Three . . . I don’t think Jesus was just worried about Martha hustling around and doing stuff. Taking it back to the Greek, the word “distracted” means “drawn away”, and the word “serving” actually means “preparations” and “ministry”*. Martha was drawn away from Jesus because she was so busy with her ministry of the moment. That’ll preach y’all. How often do we let our ministry and serving, whatever those may be, no matter how good and Godly they are, get in the way of our relationship with our Savior? I think Jesus was far more concerned with Martha’s heart, with Martha’s need to be in control, to manage everything, than He was about her being physically busy. Because when you “get” Martha, you get that Martha was probably a perfectionist control freak. She thought that she was keeping everything under control by doing all the things. And, as we all know, that control is just an illusion. Jesus wasn’t just after Martha’s attention. He was after her heart. He wanted her to relinquish control and learn to trust Him.
Lying in bed at four in the morning, I may not be physically doing anything, but mentally I’m running a marathon. I’m handling it all. I’m maintaining control, or at least I think I am. I can keep on keeping on. I’m not just good at this, I excel at this. I can lose sleep in order to maintain the illusion of control. Or I can close my eyes and sit at the feet of Jesus and let Him handle it. And if and when there’s something that actually needs to be done, because yes, there is absolutely a time to get yourself moving, I have no doubt He’ll let me know.